Seeking True Love in Second Life
Dating services in the online game Second Life try to accommodate both players looking for real-world romance and those only seeking a virtual fling.
PHOTO GALLERY: Cupid's Lagoon inside Second Life caters to a range of romantic interests.
Page 2 of 2 -- Yet Marc says financial concerns legitimatize the need for virtual dating. He also feels his AvMatch users with disabilities benefit from their participation on the site by getting to have some sense of a normal dating life.
Sarah, a Second Life player from the United States, has a form of Dwarfism. The condition has left her unable to walk and dependent on a vent in order to breathe.
“At one time only in my life, I did want to meet someone specific from Second Life,” she said. “Unfortunately, he felt differently. It would also pose a challenge, as I am severely disabled.”
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Resigned from looking for love outside of the virtual world, Sarah signed up for AvMatch hoping to fulfill her wish of finding a soul mate solely for Second Life.
“I am happy in real life, but having a Second Life partner is everything to me,” she said. “We could share everything without any limits.”
Sarah feels avatar relationships more closely mimic human ones than people might think.
“Like real life, you have good and bad experiences,” she said. “I have had several incidents where dates have left after finding out that I am disabled. I have had a partner that emotionally abused me. I have had partners that lied to me. I have had partners that were mentally ill. On a positive note, I went on several wonderful dates with someone a few weeks ago.”
Other Second Life players spend actual money to join dating services run from inside the game. Cupid’s Lagoon charges a membership fee of 300 Second Life Lindens ($1.45) to view profiles, while competitor Fresh Start costs 100 Lindens (69 cents).
More than 600 paying members have registered at Cupid’s Lagoon over the past year. Anne from Ontario, whose avatar Sweety Basevi is one of the managers at the organization, estimated their clients in real life range in age from 19 to 70, with around 60 percent being men. She knows of many committed couples who have met through Cupid’s Lagoon, including two avatars who even got married inside Second Life.
“I’d say most people are just looking for a Second Life relationship first, possibly moving into a real-life one after a period of time,” Anne said. “When I’m asked about it, I tell people to use caution, use common sense and use your own judgment about how fast or slow things should go.”
Her Cupid’s Lagoon co-worker, who requested to be called by his Second Life name of Darius Genira, revealed he had met an avatar through the service who he has now been dating for several months. Genira also believes most people using a Second Life dating service are just looking for digital romance.
“I think it somewhat rare to find people who want to meet in real life in Second Life,” he said. “You could meet someone you really like, and they could be on another continent, which makes it a bit hard to meet up.”
However, both Genira and Marc argue that their respective services help singles find emotionally-fulfilling romantic relationship by providing them with the opportunity to meet a long-term partner with whom they can live out their digital days.
“Even when these relationships remain Internet-based, they provide companionship, entertainment, personal growth and many other forms of fulfillment that people may not be able to have so readily otherwise,” said Marc.
Yet Geoff remains convinced that some daters on AvMatch and in Second Life will be looking for love outside of the game. He continues to spend two to three hours every day inside the virtual world, hoping to find a partner for his avatar, Zack, and perhaps one day, himself as well.
“I do still hope to find a Second Life relationship that turns into real life,” he said. “It's the best way I have of getting to know people, so it’s my best bet at finding someone.”
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